When your wedding invitation RSVP date rolls around, hopefully you will have received all of your guest responses and can then submit your official guest count to your wedding venue. However, it’s most often the case that wedding couples are left waiting for a handful of non-responders’ answers, which can be very frustrating. You might think, “They received their invitations weeks ago! How could they not respond?” Read more…
Wedding etiquetteWedding etiquette, Wedding guests, Wedding Invitations, wedding planning | author: By Preston Postlethwaite, Banquet Manager, The Manor
Save the Date Cards arrive in the mail, letting invited guests know when and where your wedding will take place, so that they have plenty of time to make their travel and lodging arrangements and be present for your wedding day. It’s become a new Must in wedding planning to send Save the Date cards or magnets, and many couples in northern New Jersey and in New York City are among those across the country investing a tremendous amount of thought, time and money in their Save the Dates, to make a grand first impression and set the tone for the wedding to come.
No matter if you’ll order Save the Date cards online or order custom Save the Date cards, you’ll need to know the answer to this top wedding planning question: when should we send out our save-the-dates? Read more…
So you’re ready to write your wedding thank you notes, but what is the proper etiquette for what to say? As a popular New Jersey wedding venue, we’ve tapped the expertise of wedding professionals to offer some wedding etiquette tips for writing thank you notes.
The guidelines here are fairly straightforward:
- Be sure to express your genuine appreciation, but avoid being so over-the-top that your gratitude seems false.
- Thank your guests for attending, and if there was any notable distance or effort involved in getting there, do acknowledge it. (If they didn’t attend but sent a gift or other well wishes, acknowledge that instead.)
- Reference the specific gift(s) given and personalize your thoughts about it (Perhaps a specific use you’ll have for it or how you already enjoy it, how you’ll think of them when you use it, something specific you enjoy about it, etc.) The recipients will be glad to know that you safely received their gift (especially if they came via mail) and that you are aware they are the ones who gave it to you – and ideally that the thought they put into the purchase (even if it was from your registry) was appreciated. Read more…
As a popular New Jersey wedding venue, we’ve received so many gracious thank you notes from our many lovely couples. Some have come quite quickly and others in good time. Regardless of the timing or the manner in which they come, we were are always appreciative, but never expecting to receive these thank yous. Your wedding guests, particularly those who have given you a wedding gift, however, will most likely be anticipating a thank you in response. And proper wedding etiquette dictates that sending a timely thank you note is a must.
Because the note writing process falls after the day itself, it is one of the more overlooked parts of your wedding duties. But it is no less important, because your response is a direct reflection on you (and if you wait too long, you may soon start hearing from your mother or mother-in-law that it is a reflection on them as well). Good timing also goes a long way to show your guests that you are genuinely appreciative that they were part of your special day. Read more…
Wedding etiquettemay have relaxed in some areas, but the long-held ‘rules’ still hold true with invitations. On this blog, we talked about giving guests a +1, and now we’re focusing on the art, and etiquette, of addressing your invitations.
- The number one rule of wedding invitation etiquette is that it’s a Don’t to print out guests’ names and addresses on labels. Guests are not impressed when they see labels on the formal invitation envelopes, so be sure to hand-write yours out. Read more…
When making your wedding guest list, you’ll have to decide if you’ll allow all of your single guests to bring a date – commonly known as a ‘+1.’ Wedding etiquette rules used to state that all single guests over the age of eighteen are to be given permission to bring a date, but today’s brides and grooms prefer to surround themselves with guests they know.
To eliminate wedding stress, make it a rule that you will give a +1 only to single guests whose boyfriends or girlfriends you know and have socialized with in the past. This creates a boundary that single guests cannot argue with when you explain it politely to them.
Of course, engaged couples and longtime couples must receive a +1, and it’s good form to give a single or widowed senior citizen a +1, so that he or she may bring a friend or a health aide.
You’ll find, as many of our recent wedding couples do, that your single friends accept your decision and look forward to attending the wedding solo, joining all of the other solo guests in unencumbered mingling, dancing, flirting, fine dining and perhaps meeting a future romantic interest. Not every single guest is going to be offended at the lack of an ‘And Guest’ on the invitation. Some are even relieved that they do not have to find a date, nor do they have to give a more generous wedding gift check from two guests.
If a guest calls to ask for a +1, simply explain that your wedding plans do not allow for additional invitations, and you wouldn’t want to offend any other guests who also requested to bring a date. If parents call to ask if their teenager can bring a friend, that too is best met with, “I’m sorry, but we can’t make any exceptions to our guest rule, since we don’t want to offend other guests who have asked to bring others.” It’s best to avoid the temptation to blame your budget or wedding venue space issues; simply place the reasoning on your boundaries and consideration of other guests.
Be firm and confident in your boundaries, since one exception made by you will quickly hit the grapevine, and other guests will start calling to request their own +1s.
Michael Mahle, Director of Communications, Pleasantdale Chateau
To make an appointment with a banquet manager, please contact us at 973-325-2060.